Only Child Syndrome
Ahhh, the only child syndrome. Don’t you love it when that kicks in? As I stare into the face of my son I am literally speechless with gratitude at his interaction with me, his expectations, his...
View ArticleTea Party Dreams
I tried to watch the Republican debate sponsored by the Tea Party last night but kept dozing off. Before you label me as un-American or a TP hater or a bitch for implying that the candidates weren’t...
View ArticleDance Until The World Ends
As I jump up and down screaming with my girlfriends, swilling cheap (tasting, not costing) white wine from Time Warner Arena, Britney Spears struts her stuff across the stage. I am celebrating my...
View ArticleMen Are From Mars; Women Are From A Planet Where You Don't Leave Child Vomit...
Before you jump to any conclusion that this blog is going to be at all bitchy towards my sweet husband -- whom I married 15 years ago tomorrow -- banish the thought. Truly, I am sure that everyone...
View ArticleWhat America Deserves
To my conservative friends . . .I cannot believe I am about to do this. Me – the Obama supporter, the bleeding-heart liberal, the feminist, the progressive . . . I am going to try to convince you to...
View ArticleSo the boy asks Penn State: Who will rage for me?
Consumed by your fury you wave your signs and screamDid anyone scream for me?You gather in great numbers, you are a force to be reckoned withDid you gather and circle to protect me?You are outraged...
View ArticleNew Birther Scandal: Is Perry Really a Mom?
Did you remember to watch the last Republican debate? I can never recall exactly when they are supposed to be on, but since there’s one every other day I manage to hit them with some regularity while...
View ArticleWide Open Spaces
The first one was a bloody mess, with some shocked squeals and laughter, at a pretty inopportune time. I frantically searched the car for a tissue, a napkin, a wipe, something (Jesus, what kind of...
View ArticleThree Cheers For Affirmative Action
I am a fan of affirmative action. And not only because it has helped many leaders and thinkers and doers rise above institutionalized racism and gender-based inequality so that they may enjoy their...
View ArticleKarma Alarma
I am getting really nervous about my standing with the universe. What kind of karmic comeback can I expect for allowing my sweet sister-in-law -- who is seven months pregnant, working, with two born...
View ArticleLetter To Santa from the Christmas Bitch
Dear Santa,I guess this may not be the best time to throw this at you, what with Christmas arriving in less than a week. I suppose I should have gotten this list to you sooner. But since you’ve got...
View ArticleLost and Found
This is what keeps running through my head. The mom, desperate to find her missing teenaged daughter, is startled to come upon a homeless girl out in the cold. The girl tells her she left home after...
View ArticleMs. PAC Mom
I need a Swift Boat Mommy PAC. Like the one Romney has at work in Iowa. I heard about it on NPR today. Restore Our Future ruthlessly attacks his competition – such that Gingrich has been brought to...
View ArticleThe View From 2: Life is Sweet
I have a new hero. She is a total bad-ass. She knows what she wants and she gets it. She creates her own reality. But not in a bitchy, aggressive way. Or a bitter, passive-aggressive way. In...
View ArticleHere's to you, Mr. Robinson
So we were at this really great Christmas party when it happened. Our kids were stuffing Christmas cookies and brownies in their mouths as fast as their little hands would do the deed, and I was...
View ArticleI'm sexy and I know it (I work out)
I got a passion in my pants and I ain’t afraid to show it. Thank GOD Valentine’s Day is Tuesday! Do not think that just because I am over 40, the mother of 2 exhaustingly rambunctious boys, living a...
View ArticleBoob Job: An Immodest Proposal
The teenager adjusted her bikini, threw her lanky legs over the wall, and placed her long body across the dark rocks. With the ocean crashing behind her she looked to her mother – holding the camera –...
View ArticleWhat Every Mom Should Know
What’s your score? You know, on your Mom-SAT. What, you don’t KNOW your score? You didn’t know you were being tested? Oh, silly, of course you did. Although in your defense, the components of this...
View ArticleSpring Broke
I grab Number Two’s hand and speak firm and low. “I will give you candy from the gift shop if you say you want to go back to the hotel right now,” I whisper, as Number One and my husband jabber away...
View ArticleRacist. Homophobic. Ignorant. American?
It wasn’t what she wrote on the blog that led to her semi-forced resignation. It was the picture that went with it that depicted President Obama in heels . . . eating a piece of fried chicken. John...
View ArticleObama Mama
The phone rings in that annoying way it has – just when I have pulled wet laundry out of the machine or am frantically stir-frying dinner. “Honey,” I yell to my son, “Who’s calling?” He runs to the...
View ArticleSummer Schooled or How I Learned The Whistle Song Isn't About Trains
“This song teaches you how to whistle,” my seven year-old announces authoritatively from the back seat. I glance at the Sirius radio screen and hum along. Nice. Catchy tune. I should learn the words...
View ArticleThe Circus Is Coming To Town
Do you remember when you were a kid and the circus was all about larger-than-life acrobatic feats, crazy clowns, amazing animals . . . and lots of bells and whistles and blinking lights and popcorn...
View ArticleThe Last Time I Saw Paula Broadwell
The last time I saw Paula Broadwell I was completely over the moon to find myself at a party with my number-one-by-a-landslide TV crush, Jon Stewart. I’d heard that he was at a neighbor’s house for an...
View ArticleWill he love me best now that Obama won?
"Who are you going to vote for?" I ask casually while typing the internet address for my eight year old son. "Obama," he answers, and I smile. "No, Romney!" he announces, and my hands pause over the...
View ArticleShut Up
There is an alarming and unfortunate condition that I have self-diagnosed. I am looking for answers and treatments and even support groups as I navigate this new no-man’s land. Or rather no-words...
View ArticleThe Fast (Life) Diet
There is a new program that will transform your life, and everyone I know is doing it. Unwanted baggage melts away as soon as you begin. The plan is based on a simple 5/2 formula: Take the activities...
View ArticleYou say you are disgusted with Congress . . . but would YOU cross the aisle?
I am. Crossing over, that is. I am not voting against Patrick Cannon, Democratic nominee for mayor of Charlotte. I am, however, voting FOR Republican Edwin Peacock. Let me tell you why.After the most...
View ArticleThe Sisterhood of the Traveling Rants
So it looks like we are going to have to take this show on the road, skirt! sisters. It is the end of an era!Were you shocked when you got the email announcing the end of the blogging site for skirt? I...
View Article
